By Jeff Ware, Student Life Pastor
As 2021 ended, I took some time to think back on my first full year in my parenting journey. On the one hand, I’m grateful for the Godly advice that was given to me by older parents who had already raised their now adult children. All the good advice I had chosen to follow paid great dividends. On the other hand, hindsight leaves me with some regrets...things I wish I had done differently as a dad.
One of my personal parenting regrets relates to prayer. Yes, we prayed for our child. But all too often, those prayers were squeezed in between other activities on our busy and frantic schedules. Looking back, I also realize that our prayers were “amped up” in frequency and intensity when we were in the midst of navigating difficult parenting matters. I’m sure that’s not unusual, but I do wish that the frequency and intensity of those “tough time” prayers had been the usual rather than the from time to time.
Since this is the month that we make resolutions, why not take some time to challenge yourself to pray regularly for your children in the same manner that Jesus prayed in the Garden of Gethsemane the night before His death. The great English preacher Charles Spurgeon wrote that there are five aspects to the way Jesus prayed in Matthew 26:39 that we would do well to emulate. How might enlisting each of these aspects change the way you pray for your children?
First, our prayer for our children should be lonely prayer. This does not mean that we are to feel alone as we parent our kids. Rather, we are to look regularly for opportunities to withdraw from all the regular activities, hurriedness, and distractions of life to focus solely on prayer. Jesus was deliberately by himself where no ears but God’s ears would hear his prayers. A lonely prayer is an intense and focused prayer.
Second, our prayer for our children should be humble prayer. When Jesus approached his Father in prayer, He fell with his face to the ground. This was a position that represented humble recognition of his Father’s power, sovereignty, and holiness. Sometimes we get lost in thinking that we know what to do and how to do it. The reality is, that if we depend solely on ourselves and not on God for guidance, direction, wisdom, and power, we are doomed to eventually fail. It’s better to humbly fall flat on your face while crying out to God in prayer, than falling flat on your face through failure rooted in self-reliance.
Third, our prayer for our children should be filial or familial prayer. The word “filial” signifies the affection, respect, and devotion from a son or daughter to a parent. Jesus assumed a filial posture as he approached his Heavenly Father. In the same way, those of us who have been adopted by God as His sons and daughters must “plead” our adoption, recognizing that God has given us the right and privilege to approach Him as His children.
Fourth, our prayer for our children should be persevering prayer. The Bible tells us that while he was in the Garden, he prayed three times. Prayer for our children should be regular and ongoing.
And fifth, our prayer for our children should be submissive prayer. If you’re like me, your prayers are uttered while assuming that you know what the most desirable answer and outcome should be. But the prayer of Jesus reminds us that we must trust God’s wisdom, as He will give us the answer we need. We must pray, “not my will, but Your will be done.”
This year, let us be intentional about prayer, especially when it is for our children.
